Devo's Blog

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Princess P

That's how I've begun to vizualize my ex. It's a metaphor full of meaning, here's some:

Her last name starts w/ the letter P.

P can also stand for "porcupine" - she sure was a prickly one!

P also works for "paranoia" - as in "Paranoia, the destroyer'" (The Kinks). How many times did that song run through my brain when she would freak out on me? Too many. Still gives me the heebie-jeebies...

Princess:

  • I treated her like one - she brought out the romantic streak in me and I was lavish with my affection.
  • She played the role of "damsel in distress" to the tee and I complemented it like Sir Galahad, compulsively coming to her rescue time and time again. She even called me "her knight in shining armor" once. Crazy behavior in hindsight.
  • She certainly liked to be treated like one - she liked the attention. She didn't like it when I didn't see things her way though - then it was "off with your head!"
  • I often felt inferior - the commoner to her royalty, especially regarding my Christian faith. My feelings didn't matter much - hers trumped mine.

Princess also resonates with one of my favorite movies, "The Princess Bride." Some stuff about that:

  • Gives me a way to laugh anxiety away: "Wuv, twoo wuv"; "Stop your rhyming, I mean it!" - "Anybody want a peanut?"; "My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father. Prepare to die."; "He's not dead, only MOSTLY dead."; "Have fun storming the castle!" That's funny stuff! :)
  • The Princess Buttercup fails to recognize The Dread Pirate Roberts as her very own Westley - the love of her life - and treats him rather boorishly until he utters the words, "As you wish," upon which she realizes her foolishness. I understand how it feels to be misconstrued and mistreated.
  • The Princess Buttercup was certainly beautiful, as was my ex. Both blonde too. Never thought I'd be attracted to a blonde - I usually prefer dark brown or red hair.

The humor thing helps the most. Hope this gives me some more hooks to hang my anxiety on.

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